March of the Summer Comic-Book Movies:

There're so many comic-inspired movies coming out this summer, I need to sort them out. Let's start with a list, chronologically by release date:

1. We have a new, potentially improved, and the potential is huge here, since Ang Lee's version stunk to high hell, Hulk movie. (The Ice Storm? Sense and Sensibility? Tortilla Soup? Lee is obviously a great fit for a movie about a fucking comic book character.) The new trailer:


Release date: June 13th

2. We have Wanted, INCREDIBLY-LOOSELY based on this comic of the same name:


Release date: June 27th

3. Next is the totally stellar comic, Hellboy. This is a sequel to the 2004 release:


Release date: June 28th

4. Hancock, a seemingly peripheral character in a handful of comics, will be released on July 2nd:




5. Lastly, we also have the new Batman movie, thankfully more Miller than Burton. Don't get me wrong, I like Tim Burton, I just like my Batman a bit more serious, his villains a bit more deranged and dangerous:


Release date July 18th.

And now I have a serious concern to address, in order to stay true to the comic book fans:

Q: Comic book movies usually suck (read: are grossly commercial, highly inaccurate), how can I defend being excited by some of these trailers?

A: Well, anonymous comic book fan, the answer to that is simple: I don't care. I know, the fact that they had to use some minor, 3rd tier character to make a superhero movie with a black lead is really telling, and yes, Wanted is totally off-base and going to be just a huge load of shit. Really, Angelina Jolie is going to stand around being Angelina and there's nothing we can do to stop it. I love comics as much as the next nerd, and yes, I also was out of my mind pissed off that Arnold Schwarzenegger played Mr. Freeze, really that he got anywhere near the whole Batman thing, but there's not much we can do about it now. Actually, the worse injustice was letting Joel "Dying Young--Phantom of the Opera--St. Elmo's Fire" Schumacher anywhere near Batman. "Dying Young" for God's sake! It's the aforementioned Ang Lee syndrome: you just don't let men who believe they are capable of writing their own subtext near comic book movies: they end up believing there is no subtext and write their own terrible underpinnings that end up undermining the whole project: Batman: great, careful, complex subtext! He embodies both hero and villain! He is the Joker! He is Two Face! Classic! Hulk: full of nuclear war responsibility/free will commentary! Use the subtext already written, assholes!

But I digress, the point is comics are fun and smart and interesting and I like coupling the joy I get from reading them with the effects Hollywood has to offer. Does that forgive casting misappropriations and directors taking too much digression with story lines and characters? No, of course not. Do those digressions ruin all the excitement and discussion and fun that come out of viewing the films? Again, of course not.

Really, potentially the most exciting comic book to movie release is the furthest away, with no trailers to link to and a release date of sometime in 2009. In the meantime we can entertain ourselves by wondering, who watches the watchmen?

Of course this has potential for being terrible all over it...but c'mon, the Comedian looks awesome! Aren't you a little excited? Shed those cynical layers and disdain for the popular appropriation of your previously shunned genre and bask in the acceptance of loosely-related, commercialized versions of your heroes! It's the only way you'll ever see Night Owl decked out like Batman ready to kick more ass than his comic-book incarnation ever could (you know his comic-self is a bit eh, well, lame: his costume made him out to be more super gay bird watcher than superhero). I'm sure I'll catch hell for that last bit: I know, I know, that was the point of Watchmen, that they were un-heroes, but I always rooted for Night Owl, both of them, and wanted them to be, well, stronger characters than they were portrayed. Here is my chance to see it. And that's what comics often are all about, isn't it? They strive for the potential to transcend limitations, the imagination to overcome the boundaries of a medium, be it that of a mild-mannered alter-ego or an underrated art form.

Flamboyant Calligraphy:

FUCK: The Big Strip Tease

I cannot read Plath and resist kneeling.

Lady Lazarus

I have done it again.
One year in every ten
I manage it--

A sort of walking miracle, my skin
Bright as a Nazi lampshade,
My right foot

A paperweight,
My face a featureless, fine
Jew linen.

Peel off the napkin
O my enemy.
Do I terrify?--

The nose, the eye pits, the full set of teeth?
The sour breath
Will vanish in a day.

Soon, soon the flesh
The grave cave ate will be
At home on me

And I a smiling woman.
I am only thirty.
And like the cat I have nine times to die.

This is Number Three.
What a trash
To annihilate each decade.

What a million filaments.
The peanut-crunching crowd
Shoves in to see

Them unwrap me hand and foot--
The big strip tease.
Gentlemen, ladies

These are my hands
My knees.
I may be skin and bone,

Nevertheless, I am the same, identical woman.
The first time it happened I was ten.
It was an accident.

The second time I meant
To last it out and not come back at all.
I rocked shut

As a seashell.
They had to call and call
And pick the worms off me like sticky pearls.

Dying
Is an art, like everything else.
I do it exceptionally well.

I do it so it feels like hell.
I do it so it feels real.
I guess you could say I've a call.

It's easy enough to do it in a cell.
It's easy enough to do it and stay put.
It's the theatrical

Comeback in broad day
To the same place, the same face, the same brute
Amused shout:

'A miracle!'
That knocks me out.
There is a charge

For the eyeing of my scars, there is a charge
For the hearing of my heart--
It really goes.

And there is a charge, a very large charge
For a word or a touch
Or a bit of blood

Or a piece of my hair or my clothes.
So, so, Herr Doktor.
So, Herr Enemy.

I am your opus,
I am your valuable,
The pure gold baby

That melts to a shriek.
I turn and burn.
Do not think I underestimate your great concern.

Ash, ash--
You poke and stir.
Flesh, bone, there is nothing there--

A cake of soap,
A wedding ring,
A gold filling.

Herr God, Herr Lucifer
Beware
Beware.

Out of the ash
I rise with my red hair
And I eat men like air.



Does it not feel like the most satisfying middle finger you've ever been lucky enough to receive? I would lick her boots: she would be disgusted.

A Daydream Fulfilled:

Often times I find myself wondering, what would it look like if Jim Henson designed a chain of drag clubs in Ireland?


Ahhh. Now I know.

An Interview with Russell Edson:

Via Double Room, please enjoy this really terrific interview with Edson: I especially like the part where he refutes most everything the interviewer infers about his work. I don't think the interviewer is wrong in his conclusions about Edson's poetry (I would agree with him on a great deal of it) but I think Edson really despises when people try to position him within any sort of poetic tradition. It is a joy to watch him wiggle out of his own pinning down every time.

Because Looking for Teaching Jobs is Depressing:

I bring you a meme via the Seacoast:

1) Ten years ago I was:
Spending all my money on women and booze, spending all my time going to concerts and getting high.

2) Five things on tomorrow's to-do list:
1. price moving companies
2. revise my CV
3. enjoy my new haricut
4. go to the dentist
5. kiss Jeannine


3) Things I'd do if I were a billionaire:
I echo Emily: pay off debt, buy a house with room for a garden, donate tons to hungry people and liberals
and also: start a print journal, buy Jeannine stuff to make movies

4) Three bad habits:
1. biting my nails
2. procrastinating
3. writing in progressive tense


5) Five places I've lived:
1. Northampton, MA
2. Aurora, IL
3. Des Moines IA
4. Amherst, MA
5. North Aurora, IL


6) Six jobs I've had:
1. English Instructor
2. Writer for the Beacon News
3. Placement Exam Reader
4. Pizza Maker
5. Music Store Manager
6. Distribution Editor for a small press

From the English:

My new Grandfather: